Wednesday, January 21, 2015

In Praise Of Pro-Dommes

Just when you think all is lost and the Fourth Estate has finally surrendered there is a glimmer of hope. After teasing us with jokes about Cosmo's advice on toilet paper bondage, Femdom Resource discusses a short, sensible Cosmo article on BDSM.

barbie as a dominatrix by nancy farmer
Barbie Domme

Femdom Resource is one of my favourite blogs, Written by a male sub it has a positive outlook on kink showing the sunny side of it where others only see gloom and doomme. After I published my post - a critique of a professional dominatrix who advocates liberating men sexually to advance feminism - i began to wonder if 2015 would be the year in which BDSM would be blamed for everything. After all this is the year when 50 Shades hits the cinema's. So when I saw Paltego's latest post with the rather explosive title "Cosmo article shocker" I knew it was not about electric dog collars, after all it is Cosmo and I was intrigued.

Femdom Resource discusses a brief article about a couple visiting a pro-domme, a very sensible idea, couples can learn about BDSM in a safe environment from an experienced teacher.
But what I liked most about the article is how Femdom Resource talks about professional dominatrices. Too often they are ridiculed both inside and outside the community rather than getting the respect they deserve. People within are quick to say that everybody should be free to do as they please but when it comes to pro-dommes they somehow believe it is OK to tell others their the experience is not "real" or less valuable. I fail to understand how anyone can be so short-sighted, deciding for others what is real and what not.

Pro-dommes deserve more respect, yes they are professionals, thank goodness for that, and the fact that people feel their brand of kink is superior or do not understand what the job means is no reason to disrespect anyone. As for the general public, judging a pro-domme simply because it makes you feel better, does not show an awful lot of character.

There are many reasons to appreciate them, they make it easier for novices to take their first steps into the world of BDSM, a lot of them have versatile and creative personalities, they are highly skilled and passionate about their craft. Everyone can start out as a pro-domme but it takes skill and personality to make a career out of it and those who do, posses a lot of character and personal strength.There are as many different types of women as there are pro-dommes  and over time I have become more and more convinced that successful pro-dommes are not just technically skilled, they also poses an artistic flair that can transform an ordinary session into something special.

I came across a few pro-dommes - all the way to Tokyo - and among them were some of the greatest people I ever met, not because they fulfill my fantasies, but because they are amazing women. Ever been invited for sushi by a woman with an interest in Japanese literature after being tied up by her? Well I have.

Let me tell you something: pro-dommes are women. Very much so. Yes I know, surprising, isn't it? You can talk to them and they brush their teeth before they go to bed. Just don't tell anyone, it is our little secret.

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